Day 10 of the 365 Day Experiment. Me and My 500 Friends.

As I sat down to write tonight, I was reflecting on an incredible conversation I had today.   I  was catching up with one of my oldest and most cherished friends during my drove home from work.  For the better part of an hour, I was able to truly connect with a woman who has literally known me almost my whole life.   We met in middle school, and become friendlier as we weathered the turbulent teen years, attended the same college, pledged the same sorority, and lived together for a time post graduation. We’ve been through love, and loss, and now even share the common bond of having two daughters.  We are separated by multiple states now, and we don’t talk nearly enough.  However, when you share that much common history, and that many memories, time and distance tend to melt away.  She will always be my sister.

I juxtapose that with the realization earlier this evening that I hit “500 friends” on Facebook today.  What the hell does that represent?  That I’m super popular?  That I’m indiscriminate and will accept anyone who sends me a request (I don’t…I draw the line at my parents, my parents’ friends, and my kids’ friends.  And I kind of have to remember who you are).  Who knows?  But I tested myself by scrolling down the list and trying to think of a great memory from each “friend”.   In many cases, I could do it.  Some people I could do only superficially.  Some people were friends of my brother’s, and I cracked up remembering their hysterical childhood antics.  Some of them were mean girls who were bitchy to me or my friends when I was a teenager and are now, let’s just say, not aging gracefully.  Karma’s a bitch.  Some were rather nerdy guys who you just knew were going to grew up to be incredible men.  And they did.

And while Facebook is a fun forum to touch base and connect, nothing will ever replace human connection for me.  While this experiment ironically has me reaching out through writing, in the short period of time I’ve been doing it, it’s sparked many offline conversations with my friends.  I dare say it may deepen what are already strong relationships.  And perhaps start new ones.  

I am grateful to my “real” girlfriends.  Two in particular.  It’s been a gut-wrechning year for me, and while I shared at the beginning of this experiment that I don’t rely heavily on others for moral support, their unwavering friendship has provided me with the additional strength and courage I needed to power on when I wasn’t sure I could.  They are my rocks.  They are my family.  They are my true friends.  

Having 500 friends is fun online.  But I’ll take a handful of deep, meaningful relationships who have my back any day of the week.