Like many people with a number of "Facebook friends," I jump on to see what's new in some of my favorites' worlds. It seems the longer you are a member, the larger your community becomes. And, as I realized recently, it's not unlike high school. And that for me makes it pretty interesting.
There are people who clearly peaked at 17. They are living for "Throw Back Thursday" and relish posting pictures of themselves in their high school glory days.
There are people who were in their "awkward" phase back then, but have thrived since those dark days. I love seeing the kids who were a little Anthony Michael-ish from his Breakfast Club/Sixteen Candles days evolve into amazing men. And those slightly geeky girls who have now blossomed into the most confident and beautiful of swans.
And then of course, there are those who just need attention. They didn't know how to get it back then, and their constant updates proclaiming "OMG! The line to grab my grande skinny soy latte is insane this morning!!!" While I'm sure these updates appeal to some part of the population, I'll go with the "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" approach on this one.
But then there are the more real connections, which is when FB stops being a thing that is fun to peek at when I'm stuck in heavy traffic, and actually becomes a tool of incredible connection.
I "like" that I am able to catch up with my best childhood girlfriend who moved to California, through her posts and pictures about her beautiful family.
I "like" that I am able to see how some of my more creative friends approach their interaction with this social media. They make it interesting, fresh, and always worth visiting their pages.
I "like" that I am able to open FB each day and smile at a newly posted picture posted by my incredibly talented photographer friend. I smile at her talent, and at the strength and happiness I know she is finding in her new life.
I "like" cheering on people's accomplishments. I get excited seeing people proud of themselves or their kids for achieving new goals or conquering their dreams.
But mostly, I "like" reconnecting in a meaningful way with people. One of the best things this Experiment has done for me by forcing me to put myself out there so publicly is to open myself up to connection to people's commentary; for better or worse. And tonight, I was reminded about just how powerful that is.
Most people who "read me" do not comment directly to FB. They message me offline. Over the past 248 days, I've connected with a crazy number of people. The ones that have meant the most are when something I wrote about strikes a chord and causes a person to reach out and tell me how it affected them, or how they had a similar experience and how they handled it. Many of these dialogues take place online (totally contrary to the post I wrote about last night about "Technology is a Tool." But some turn into deeper conversations which result in a more personal discussion. Like tonight.
A friend from high school and I became FB friends a while back. We weren't close in school, but I always knew him to be a really nice guy. And soon after we connected, I learned he lost his wife not long ago to a battle with cancer. He's now a single dad with daughters similar in age to my mine. And he's been reading my stuff. For some reason, he finds some of it thought provoking and somewhat helpful at this point in his life. And tonight, as he does every so often, he messaged me about a single parent question.
After a few messages were exchanged, I realized it was far too complex a topic to cover over a chat. So I sent him my number and we ended up chatting for a long while. He got some added perspective he was looking for, and I got a deeper connection with a really good person. I live for those connections.
In high school, I was always pretty open to who I was friends with. As FB has allowed the world a social media vehicle to project how they would like to be perceived to whoever is their "friend," - or the world, depending on the settings - it's up to each of us to decide who we choose to engage with based on what they put out there.
And like high school you can be friendly with a whole bunch of people and still really connect with your core group. Facebook hasn't just allowed me to laugh, cheer, cry and yes, ignore my friend's posts. It's allowed me to open my world to really interesting people - old friends and new.
I really "like" that.
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