Another day, another word presented to me to write about. Yesterday's "naked" came easily to me. I have been pondering "foggy" since it was suggested this morning. Nothing has come really come to me readily. I realized I'm foggy on the word foggy.
To me, the word defines a lack of clarity. Like when you have the inability to find the right word, or make the right decision for yourself. That doesn't happen to me often. I am usually pretty decisive and I don't tend to second guess myself often.
So I'll apply the word to others.
It is hard for me to see others in a state of fog. I seem to want to play the role of a human fog light. When I see people struggle with what to do in their lives, or with a problem they just can't seem to solve, it troubles me. And it's really challenging for me to remain a passive bystander. I want to help. I want to clear the fog out of the way. And it is hard for me, because it is not my fog to clear. I have friends in miserable relationships who complain constantly. They are spending their lives walking through a fog because they don't know what to do to better their situation. I have a friends who are miserable in their jobs , but aren't actively doing anything to get out or remedy the situation. And unless someone says "help me" or "share your perspective," it's not my place. And that is hard for me. It like to fix things. And I like to see people not be foggy with their lives.
It is easier for me at work. I am allowed to add solutions to problems; some big and some small. It is ok for me to play the role of the fog light. In my personal life it is far more difficult. it's challenging for me to keep my mouth shut when I see others struggling.
In a year when I should have been worrying about myself, I have had pretty decent clarity. I've been able to move forward in my life with focus: ensure that I do the best by my daughters, and do the best I can at work. On top of that, I need to do the best by me. My happiness no longer remains coupled with another's definition of it. There is something incredibly freeing in that realization. The choices I make that determine my future are mine alone to make, and that feels great.
And as we enter into a new year, my wish is for all of us to have some clarity in our lives. I know that's a challenge for some of us to get to. No matter how you get there, strive for it. It feels good to have a clear path; even if that means you have zero clue what lies ahead.
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